75+ Best Epic Cringey Dad Jokes That Make You Laugh Instantly

Whether you love them or love to hate them, dad jokes have become a timeless form of humor that never seems to grow old. With their perfect mix of punny wordplay and groan-worthy timing, these one-liners have a special place in every family gathering, office break, or group chat and even family occasion it always bring joy to the family.

In this article, we’ve rounded up 75+ of the best dad jokes that walk the perfect line between funny dad jokes that genuinely make you laugh, and there is some bad dad jokes that are so ridiculous, you can’t help but smile (or cringe). These jokes are clean, harmless, and perfect for sharing whether you’re a dad, know a dad, or just love that classic dad-joke energy.

Ready to laugh, groan, and maybe roll your eyes? Let’s dive in.

25+ Bad Dad Jokes That Are So Terrible, They’re Brilliant

Let’s kick things off with some bad dad jokes—you know, the ones that are so awful… they’re actually hilarious.

❝Why don’t eggs tell jokes? Because they’d crack each other up.❞
❝I only know 25 letters of the alphabet. I don’t know y.❞
❝I asked my dog what’s two minus two. He said nothing.❞
❝I told my wife she was drawing her eyebrows too high. She looked surprised.❞
❝I’m afraid for the calendar. Its days are numbered.❞
❝What do you call a factory that makes okay products? A satisfactory.❞
❝I ordered a chicken and an egg from Amazon. I’ll let you know.❞
❝Why can’t a nose be 12 inches long? Because then it would be a foot.❞
❝I’m reading a book about anti-gravity. It’s impossible to put down.❞
❝I used to be addicted to soap, but I’m clean now.❞

20+ Dad Jokes for Adults That Hit Differently

Now, for those with a more seasoned sense of humor, here are some dad jokes for adults. Still clean, but with a little more edge.

❝Why don’t scientists trust atoms? Because they make up everything.❞
❝Did you hear about the guy who invented Lifesavers? He made a mint.❞
❝I told my boss three companies were after me. He said, ‘Which ones?’ I said, ‘The gas, electric, and phone companies.’❞
❝Why did the scarecrow win an award? He was outstanding in his field.❞
❝I used to work for a blanket factory, but it folded.❞
❝My wife told me I should do lunges to stay in shape. That would be a big step forward.❞
❝How do lawyers say goodbye? I’ll be suing you.❞
❝Parallel lines have so much in common. It’s a shame they’ll never meet.❞
❝I’m on a seafood diet. I see food and I eat it.❞
❝What did the janitor say when he jumped out of the closet? Supplies!❞

20+ Corny Dad Jokes That Are Pure Gold

We couldn’t call it the best dad jokes list without adding the corny dad jokes section the kind of lines that make you roll your eyes and laugh anyway.

❝What do you call cheese that isn’t yours? Nacho cheese.❞
❝How does a penguin build its house? Igloos it together.❞
❝Why did the coffee file a police report? It got mugged.❞
❝Why don’t skeletons fight each other? They don’t have the guts.❞
❝What do you call a fake noodle? An impasta.❞
❝I only know a few jokes about umbrellas. They usually go over people’s heads.❞
❝I used to play piano by ear, but now I use my hands.❞
❝Why can’t your nose be 12 inches long? Because it’d be a foot.❞
❝Want to hear a construction joke? Oh… never mind, I’m still working on it.❞
❝Did you hear the rumor about butter? Well, I’m not going to spread it.❞

30+ More of the Best Dad Jokes (Because You Deserve It)

Here’s 30+ more because you deserve to laugh and brighten your days

❝What did one wall say to the other? I’ll meet you at the corner.❞
❝How do cows stay up to date? They read the moos-paper.❞
❝What did the big flower say to the little flower? Hi, bud!❞
❝Why did the tomato turn red? Because it saw the salad dressing.❞
❝What’s brown and sticky? A stick.❞
❝What did the fish say when it hit the wall? Dam.❞
❝What’s orange and sounds like a parrot? A carrot.❞
❝Why did the bicycle fall over? Because it was two-tired.❞
❝What kind of shoes do ninjas wear? Sneakers.❞
❝What did the grape do when he got stepped on? He let out a little wine.❞
❝Why did the cookie cry? Because his mom was a wafer too long.❞
❝How do you organize a space party? You planet.❞
❝What do you call a bear with no teeth? A gummy bear.❞
❝Why can’t you trust stairs? They’re always up to something.❞
❝How do you catch a squirrel? Climb a tree and act like a nut.❞
❝What do you call a man with a rubber toe? Roberto.❞
❝How do you make holy water? You boil the hell out of it.❞
❝I made a pencil with two erasers. It was pointless.❞
❝Why didn’t the skeleton go to the dance? He had no body to go with.❞
❝Why did the golfer bring two pairs of pants? In case he got a hole in one.❞
❝I used to be a baker, but I couldn’t make enough dough.❞
❝Why was the stadium so hot after the game? All the fans left.❞
❝What do clouds wear under their shorts? Thunderpants.❞
❝Why did the computer go to therapy? It had too many bytes from its past.❞
❝Why did the chicken go to the séance? To talk to the other side.❞
❝What did the janitor say when he finished mopping? Mop’s done!❞
❝Why can’t you hear a pterodactyl go to the bathroom? Because the “P” is silent.❞
❝I sold my vacuum cleaner—it was just gathering dust.❞
❝Did you hear about the kidnapping at school? It’s fine, he woke up.❞
❝I told my friend 10 jokes to make him laugh. Sadly, no pun in ten did.❞

Dad jokes are a rare breed they’re groan-worthy, eye-roll-inducing, and somehow still impossible not to love. Whether you laughed, cringed, or did both at once, we hope this collection gave your day a little lift.

Some of these might just be the best dad jokes ever, perfect for family dinners, awkward elevator moments, or casual text replies. And let’s be honest, a few were definitely contenders for the worst dad jokes in history the kind that make you question why you’re laughing… but laugh anyway.

At the end of the day, that’s the magic of dad jokes: so bad, they’re brilliant. And if you’ve made it this far without at least smirking, go ahead reread a few. They might just hit different the second time around.